I call this phenomenon Narrower, Deeper, Older. For a hobby that has been around a generation or two, fewer people find the hobby accessible. The people involved in the hobby are deeply involved. They have attained a high skill level. There is no supplier that caters to a casual participant. And the average age of participants is much older than it used to be.

– Arnold Kling, Narrower, Older, Deeper

I’m reminded of this when I teach beginners. There are so many terms that bridge players use as common parlance that are completely inscrutable to a player who is just starting. So in the spirit of pulling back the curtain, I’ve decided to make my own glossary!

Also, those who know me know that I have a penchant for silliness and gibberish. I will note when some jargon is particularly silly.

On the subject of hand and suit distributions

Shape

Four numbers that add to 13. 4432, 5332, 5431, et al. This is the “shape” of a hand, or of a suit.

Declarer preempted 3C with 1345 shape! Can you believe it?!

Diamonds were 4333 around the table.

Fit

Two numbers that describe declarer’s and dummy’s trump length.

I played the 4-4 diamond fit instead of the 5-4 heart fit.

Break

How the remaining cards in a suit split in the opponents’ hands

The diamonds broke 3-2 so I had plenty of tricks.

Bad break/broke bad

An unlucky/very uneven split.

Trumps broke bad. 4-1 offside.

On the subject of describing/narrating hands

Singleton

One card in a suit.

Stiff

Synonym of singleton.

Kingleton (silly!)

Singleton king. I’m sure this has been invented independently many times over.

Queengleton (extra silly!)

Eh. I think I’ve heard it before in jest.

Jingleton (extra silly)

Okay nobody says this. We always say stiff Jack.

Tight

2-3 honors alone with no supporting cards.

My hearts? KQ tight.

Long Legged

5-5 or more extreme shape.

Swan

7-4 shape.

Albatross

8-4 shape.

Quack

A queen or a jack.

Bullet

An Ace.

Nth, N to the card, N dead, N bagger

All of these are ways to narrate suit lengths.

3 dead, 4 bagger, 5 to the Q, Q fifth.

The implication is that the spot cards are small/irrelevant.

I held Queen Jack sixth.

I had a 5 bagger.

I held 5 to the Queen.

Empty Nth

Like Nth, but emphasizing the uselessness of the spots.

Declarer had Ace empty fourth.

N times

Like Nth. I haven’t heard this used in a long time though.

He held the K five times.

and 1, dub

When a basketball shooter is fouled on the play but makes the shot, and gets to take 1 extra free throw.

No, it’s a way of describing a doubleton. King and one, Jack and one, etc.

Or King dub, Queen dub.

Moose, rock crusher

A very, very good hand. Usually tons of high card points, but also tricks.

Texture, Purity

Whether the hand has honors and good spot cards in its long suits or its short suits

K xxxxx xxxxx AK has very poor texture or purity.

x AKxxx KT9xx xx has very good texture or purity.

On the subject of cardplay

Finesse

Trying to win with a card that is not absolutely high. The most classic example is leading low toward AQ and playing the Q.

Hook

Synonym of finesse. Can be used interchangeably.

I took the spade hook.

I hooked the spade.

I took the spade finesse.

Onside

If a finesse works, that card was onside. It was placed the side we wished it was on.

In the Pocket, Slotted

See onside.

Offside

Antonym of onside.

Chinese Finesse

Leading an honor as an illegitimate finesse. For example, leading Q from Qxx toward Axx.

I’m Chinese, you can say it. I give you permission.

Practice Finesse

Taking a finesse that cannot gain a trick and can only cost a trick. Your finesse was for practice.

Plain suit

A suit that is not trumps.

Ruff

A verb synonym of trump.

Declarer led a heart and ruffed it.

Pitch, Toss, Shake, Shed, Throw, etc.

Failing to follow suit and playing a plain suit.

Sluff

Same as pitch. Rarely used unless it’s in conjunction with ruff, e.g. ruff and sluff.

Carved, Butchered, Chopped it up

When declarer takes a really, really bad line and went down.

On the subject of second hand play

Split

To play a high card from touching cards in second seat.

He split the J from JT9.

Duck

To play a small card when there was an opportunity to win.

You have to duck the Ace twice.

Cover

Playing an honor over an opponent’s played honor.

Cover an honor with an honor!

Fly, Hop, Left Jab, Sky, Rise

Playing second hand high.

Drop

When a significant card falls underneath another.

He dropped my Kingleton offside!

Pin

When first seat plays a highish card and drops a significant card from 4th seat.

   AQ876
K32 --- T
   J954

If south leads the J, the T will get pinned.

Crash

When one sides honors are spent on the same trick. May or may not be forced.

Partner flew the King and crashed my Queen!

Idiot Coup

Trying to get your opponents to crash their top honors. Usually Kx – A

Grosvenor

A play that loses, but does not actually lose because your opponents give it back to you because they cannot fathom that you have made such a huge blunder.

Guys you have to read the article. It’s my favorite piece of bridge literature ever.

Grosvenor Gambit

Greek Gift

Giving declarer something that he cannot do himself (like a finesse) in an attempt to harm him should he accept it. For example, if the honor is offside and he cannot finesse and will be forced to drop it, so you give him the finesse.

Nullo

A line of play that is strictly dominated by another. (This is a bad thing.)

Miami Endplay

In a 3 card ending, instead of endplaying your opponent, you endplay yourself!

  --- Q92
  AJ8

You can exit the 8 and achieve an endplay. Or you can cash the A and achieve a Miami Endplay.

On the subject of bidding and conventions

Strain

An all inclusive word for trumps that includes NT. The strains are clubs, diamonds, hearts, spades, NT.

Bid

A bid! A bid is a number followed by a strain.

Call

An all inclusive word for any bid you can make at the bridge table. This includes pass, double, redouble.

Punt, Wiggle

A call that shows nothing. Used to buy time/try to get partner to bid something.

Grunt

A nebulous minimum opening bid. Something like 1D showing 2+ diamonds and 11-15 points.

Drop, Bail

To end the auction in some contract.

Partner opened 1NT and I dropped him in 2S

They tried to double us in 2H but partner bailed to 3C!

Psych

Often spelled “psyche” by bridge players. Maybe we’re all fortune tellers or something.

A bid that is a deliberate and gross distortion of your hand. The intent (deliberate) is significant.

It’s short for “psychic,” which also makes no sense. Yes I know the origin and it still makes no sense don’t @ me I will not be taking further questions.

Swish

When a bid gets passed out.

What was the auction? 4S swish.

Check

Pass. Poker players, am I right?

Hit it, blood, business, whack, wield the axe, drop the hammer

Doubling for penalty.

Convert, sit

When partner makes a takeout double, but you convert it to penalty by passing.

Hit it back, send it back

Redoubling for penalty.

Heat seeking, train the guns

A double that announces values and intent to penalize.

Chicken Texas (sillyish but also accurate)

Texas Transfers are a commonly played convention where 4D shows hearts and 4H shows spades. Sometimes, if we’re worried that partner may not understand that 4H shows spades, we might bid 4S ourselves. So 4D shows hearts, 4H shows spades but we’re chicken, so we bid 4S.

On the subject of bridge scores

Kiss of Death

A bridge score of 200. At matchpoints, +200 is often a top/-200 is a bottom.

Sticks and Wheels

A score of 1100. Two sticks, two wheels.

Going for a number, a telephone number

A large penalty. I suspect the etymology is because 800 is a telephone number.
Edit: piggrass informs me that telephone numbers used to be four digits!

Top

A very good matchpoint score. Taken literally, it means 100%, but often is used as hyperbole/approximation. To emphasize a full 100%, people often use an adjective along with top. A cold top, a complete top, tippy top, etc.

Push

At imps, a board with no swing (no imps gained or lost.)

On the subject of written notation

Suit Order

When suits are not notated (and they should not be; it makes it harder to read), the implicit order is SHDC.

Parentheses

Parentheses are used to describe shape that is interchangeable within the parens. (31)(54) means 31 in the majors either way around, 54 in the minors either way around.

Dash vs Equal

5-4-3-1 is synonymous with 5431: any 5431 shape.
5=4=3=1 is exactly 5 spades, 4 hearts, 3 diamonds, 1 club.

On the subject of Total Nonsense

SDAM

A weird joke about how Six Diamonds Always Makes.

Both Sides Favorable

Chew on that one for a while.

British terms to describe the four vulnerability combinations

Oh bugger off, ya wanker.

The Beer Card

The D7 is known as the beer card. Roughly speaking (people play by different rules, but these should be universal), if you make your contract as declarer and the D7 was your final winning trick, partner owes you a beer. Diamonds may not be trumps.

Same for the defense if they set the contract.

The most important asset in Bridge Brawl.

Australian Push

A difference of 7 or fewer imps. Maybe the number is different (higher?), but you get the idea.

The rule of N

Hey, I have a bridge to sell you!

“Standard”, “No Agreement”

Alright, keep your secrets.

DSIP

Do Something Intelligent, Partner. See Blame Transfer below.

Blame Transfer

Setting up your partner to make the final mistake.

Cuebid

AN OVERLOADED TERM WHY DO WE CALL CONTROL BIDS CUEBIDS AS WELL

Table Feel

Taking an anti-percentage play because you’re psychic. See? That’s how you use the word “psychic.”

SOS

How to get into even more trouble than you’re already in.

UBH

use brain H

Well, it had play

You went down. It was bad.

Cold

Describing to your partner how obvious it was to make it.

Frigid

Really, REALLY obvious.

Lurker Check

How to save face when you draw an extra round of trump after everyone’s out.

Lurker Check, haha!

Expert Standard

How to justify all of your (incorrect) bidding.

You want me to poll this on BridgeWinners!? I’ll poll this on BridgeWinners!!

Yeah, that’ll go well.